I never considered myself a perfectionist, seeing as my life has always been “in shambles” so to speak. I have never been able to keep my living space clean, I got poor grades in school, and my artwork has always been pretty sloppy. In retrospect, however, I’ve accepted the fact that some of these failures stemmed from a desire to be perfect in a way that is not achievable. At least not for me.
I tend to put off cleaning up after myself because I am very particular about how things get put away. I like for every object to have its own home, preferably labelled, and placed neatly there. This is rather time consuming, and as a result my belongings tend to hang out wherever I drop them until that magical day when I will have the time to create the perfect space for them…you see where this is going?
In school, I often gave up on assignments if I couldn’t get them just right, preferring to take a zero rather than reveal to my teacher the sub-par-whatever-it-was that I came up with. It doesn’t make much sense when you actually think about it.
And then of course there is the artwork. I already said it’s usually pretty sloppy. This is because I get frustrated when things don’t go the way I wanted them to go, and then I end up rushing through the rest and giving up. Or just not starting at all. Frustration.
So I am learning to let go of perfection. I keep telling myself it’s ok if I make a mistake, and it’s ok if I’m not using the top quality materials, or if I’m using the “right” techniques or the “right” brushes or whatever…the truth is, I don’t really know what the hell I’m doing most of the time. I just don’t care anymore.